Fleming Storage Unit #59: [title open to suggestions] Tape Titles (rewrite)
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Fuckin' Cage. I swear that fucking guy has been a pain in the ass for the longest time and of fucking course he said he's not able to clean his shit out of our storage unit. Me and some buddies after graduation decided to rent a storage unit together, keep some of our shit we don't want in our apartments. But of course, Chris and Jack only occasionally pay the rent for it and why should I expect Julian god damn Cage to pick up his end at all. When I got the email saying that the units were closing it was a bit of a relief because god damn finally that's one less fee I need to pay, and all I have to do is clean out my shit. The only day I was able to get my shit out of the unit was October 11 so when I told the guys the news I said that we should all go down the 11 and of course they said we should do a different day and I'm like "assholes that's the only day I can" and they came up with some sort of bullshit excuse and I told them not to expect me to clean any of their shit and they said they're still going on another day. Then Cage chimes in and says he can’t go at all and that he'd "super appreciate us packing up his stuff" and I'm like "fuck off Cage you never paid for the unit at all". So, there I was an hour past the units opening on my lonesome going to collect the minimal amount of shit, probably only would've taken me an hour. I opened the door to the storage unit and realized that I had the least amount stuff in there. I have good friends, fucking great friends. Thanks for sticking the rent on the guy with the least shit.
   All I had in there was some books, a tube of tennis balls, other tennis supplies, and some boxes. One had shit from when I was dating Lily. It'd been over a month at that point since we had broken up, and honestly, I don't know why I kept any of it or why I put it here of all places. I took one of the tennis balls out of the tube and leaned the tube up on a shelf against one of my boxes. I extended my wrist forward and bounced the ball up and down and to distract my mind from certain memories popping up and forced myself to figure out how much space my shit took up compared to everyone else. Chris had some ratty old chair, boxes filled with comics, clothes, and other shit I don't really remember. His only took up about a fourth of the space so I gave him a pass. Cage on the other hand took up pretty damn close to half the space. He had a shelf in there filled with pottery and other sculptures, stuff I think he made in high school and college. It was all actually pretty well done if I'm being honest, Cage always had a talent for that shit I guess. He also had stacks of sketchbooks, drawing mannequins, a big box filled with old ass tapes and an old video camera, one of those portable CRTs with a VCR attached. That was pretty fucking sweet. I didn't have to go anywhere that day so I said fuck it, pulled up Chris's chair, put the CRT on the shelf, lit a Pall Mall and put on some tapes.
   I watched through a couple of the tapes and was like damn, just this once Cage pulled through. I went back to the box to grab another tape and I noticed one that was unlabeled. I figured it was some home video or some vintage ass porn. Either way it could be used to embarrass Cage, so I made sure the door was closed behind me and put the tape in.
   The tape opened on a blue screen with white text spelling out "COLLECTION". I groaned in disappointment, thinking it was gonna be some shitty indie film. I decided to keep watching in hopes that it was some video project Cage worked on and was too embarrassed to tell us about. This cut to more text, this time it said "LIFE". This cut to a shot of a vase. A hand holding a stack of post-it notes slowly filled the screen. The thumb lifted the pages to the bottom note on the stack, which had a drawing on it, and began flittering up the pages. Turns out this was a flip book. It featured a man sitting in a chair watching a TV. The man laughed and an onomatopoeia of the laughter "ha ha" appeared around his head. He made a motion like wiping a tear from his eye and calmed down. The man continued to watch the TV and he gradually aged and aged and eventually decomposed into a skeleton. The skeleton turned its head away from the TV and faced the viewer. It opened its mouth and a fly came out and flew away. The fly was halfway off the page when the flip book ended.
   This made me think this was gonna be some sort of shitty horror anthology, but whatever, not like I had anything better to do. The next title appeared, "HOP, HOP", and then cut to a wide shot of a dimly lit bedroom with a woman sleeping in a bed, her back facing the camera. On a bedside table was the same vase from the first one. It stayed like this for a little while until the door to the left of the bed cracked open a bit, and a large bunny head -one of those faceless ones you'd see on a stuffed animal or a porcelain doll at an old lady's garage sale- stuck through the door and turned its head toward the woman. It stared for a little bit but then the door opened more, revealing the head to belong to the body of a man in a tracksuit and black gloves. The bunny jogger closed the door and turned to face the woman again. He stared for a good while, breathing gently. Eventually he took short, stealthy steps in front of the bed and laid down. He lifted his arms slightly and tilted his head towards the camera. He did an army crawl under the bed and disappeared into its darkness.
   The shot stayed on this for a bit and when the stillness began to unnerve me a bit I heard a repeated thud behind me. I gasped as I turned around to have my eyes meet bouncing tennis balls. The fucking tube fell over. I exhaled and turn back to see the same shot, still unchanged. A little while longer and it finally cut to a text screen, this time displaying the title "THIS IS TENNIS".
   This one opened on, yet again, that fucking vase. This time it was in a field on a small table. This quickly cut to a shot of the corner of an alley, the camera person holding the camera very shakily. He (I'm assuming the camera person is a he) peaked the camera out of the corner to now have the back of a woman fill the frame. She looked familiar, long brown hair, nice figure and- shit. It was Lily. What followed was a series of shots of following, stalking her. It all led to her opening the door to her apartment, hand twisting open the door knob unaware of her stalker. This cut to a gloved hand putting a key in her door unlocking it, arm twisting it open. He walked in and turned the corner, and there she was in the kitchen, back turned cooking. He slowly, stealthily approached her. He sensually grabbed around her waist and gently placed an arm on her shoulder. Lily said, "oh babe I didn't know you-" and she was cut off by the fucker placing his hand over her mouth. This cut to her laying down naked on her bed, playing with herself. This was the bedroom in the second tape; how the hell did I not recognize it then. The shot was set up the same as it was then, only this time the lights were on. Out of the darkness from under her bed crawled out a man wearing a dalmatian mask and morph suit, with a massive white dildo protruding from where it anatomically would make sense. Lily sat up a bit and let out a small concerned groan. The dalmatian man crawled on top of the bed, arm extending just beyond Lily's right shoulder, other limbs creeping up in the same fashion until he was on top of her, facing down. She looked the mask in the eyes and that tiny smile of hers formed as she slid her arms up around its neck. She arched her head up and kissed the nose of the mask and whispered, "please". The dalmatian grabbed the mock dick and in a belligerent motion slid it inside her as she let out a pained entrance moan. The text "COLLECTION" appeared over the footage of Lily being ravaged. The tape ended not long after the text appeared.
   What the fuck. I didn't know and still don't know for sure how Cage had this tape, and honestly, I don't care. I wanted to punch Cage's stupid fucking face in. I wanted to meet Lily in an alley and fucking gut her. My mind was exploding with thoughts like these, my heart forming a black hole and pulling itself in. I threw a tennis ball hard, harder at the door, repeatedly, my wrist flicking downward over and over rapidly till it hurt. I was going to text Cage about the tape but then decided not to; fucking flake would probably just pretend that he didn't get the text. Still, I needed to do something about the tape and destroying it wasn't going to do it justice to me. And I remembered Stars and Bards, that store that had all that nerdy stuff.
   I took the box of tapes and camera and sold them to Stars and Bards. I told the guy at the counter I'd sell all these to him for thirty and that there's a lot of good shit in there and he eagerly accepted. I could've just sold the tape on its own but also fuck Cage, piece of shit didn't deserve these tapes. I went back to the storage unit and quickly packed up my shit and closed the door a bit after 3, even being near Cage's shelves made my mind explode. I only noticed when packing up that the vase in the tape was on Cage's shelf.

I'm definitely feeling the "Fuck Cage" and the other friends vibe. It drew me in immediately. I think the first paragraph could be tidied up a bit. The part where they're trying to settle on a date is a very long sentence and a little hard to follow.

Now, I'm not really feeling the "weird tape", and it doesn't seem like your narrator does either. All of his emotion comes in at the end. What does he feel while he's watching the tape? Does he feel personally attacked or violated in some way? Mocked? What kind of emotional journey comes with this weirdo tape?

Also, what does he feel is accomplished by selling the tape to Stars and Bards? I'm a little lost there.